Heloise

Dear Heloise: How do I tell my brother and his wife that their two young boys aren’t invited to my wedding? I’m getting married in a fairly small, formal ceremony on July 4. It’s an evening, candlelit ceremony for adults only, starting around 8 p.m. A reception will follow after the ceremony.

I know that only people whose names appear on the inner envelope are invited, but this has never stopped my brother and his wife from bringing along their two young children. I probably wouldn’t mind it if the boys were well-behaved, but they aren’t! They are 7 and 5, respectively.

Last summer, the oldest boy climbed a tree, then jumped on the roof of my house and refused to come down. We had to call the fire department to get him down. I was furious when my sister-in-law laughed and said it was so “cute”! Please help me here. Should I just tell them as nicely as I can not to bring the boys? — Ava and Brent M., in North Carolina

Ava and Brent, a formal evening wedding is always an adults-only affair, but some people think that their children should be invited no matter what. Bring up the subject to your brother and his wife, stating that the two of you talked it over and decided that you wanted an adults-only wedding.

And really, 8 p.m. is too late for children this young to attend a wedding and a reception afterward. If your brother asks if you’ll make an exception for their two boys, tell them “no” and explain why. — Heloise

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GARDENING TOOL CARE

Dear Heloise: The handles of my gardening tools used to look terrible after one season of use in the sun and rain. Finally, a friend of mine told me to spray the wooden handles with a varnish of some kind to make them waterproof — and to never leave them outside to rust in the rain.

Considering the rising cost of everything, it was sound advice to take better care of my tools, and they last longer. I’ve had some of my gardening tools for 10 years now, and they look almost new. — Stephen W., in Eugene, Oregon

CHICKS AND HENS

Dear Heloise: My husband and I decided to move to the country, and we love it out here. I wanted to raise chickens, but I was a novice who didn’t know what to do. A neighbor told me that I could introduce adopted chicks to a hen if I took day-old hatchlings and slipped them under the hen at night when she sleeps. In the morning, both the chicks and hens will have become used to the sound and smell of one another, and the hen will feel like the chicks are hers.

I tried it, and sure enough, it works! My little chicks have new mamas, and the hens take care of their new babies. — Carmen E., in Portales, New Mexico

CURING DRY HAIR

Dear Heloise: My hair is as dry as a bone. I have tried hair conditioners and masks, but they only offer temporary relief. I brush my hair often and use the 100-strokes method, but I still have dull, brittle hair. What should I be doing to get a good shine and fewer split ends? — Tanya G., in Colby, Kansas

Tanya, you might want to consult with a hairdresser to find the best routine for your hair. In the meantime, you should probably give yourself a few hot oil treatments. Be sure to work the oil down the strands and get them covered. (Olive oil works well for this treatment.)

Then take a shower cap, put it over your hair, and leave it on for at least 2 hours (or overnight if you can). Be sure to tuck all your hair inside the cap. Afterward, wash your hair with a mild shampoo and remove all the excess oil. If you need to shampoo twice to get all the oil out, this is OK, but skip the conditioner. — Heloise