Think your job is hard?

It has only been a few years since I held this occupational title, but, apparently, it has been long enough to forget just how difficult the job really is.

Working full-time and having a significant other to help on weekends “dulled my edge”, so to speak, in regard to being a full-time caregiver. That is, until I was recently smacked upside the head with a dose of 9-month-old reality.

While it is beyond rewarding, there are also times when being a stay-at-home parent reminds me of the famous “Jerry Maguire” quote. Not the mushy one. This one: “It is an up-at-dawn, pride-swallowing siege that I will never fully tell you about, OK?”

Why, you ask, does this quote accurately define the parent/child (infant in particular) all-day, everyday interaction? Here are a few reasons:

1. You no longer sleep according to your own schedule. You are now at the mercy of an infant’s whims. And they don’t like sleep. At least mine doesn’t. It doesn’t matter if it is dark out, if you are tired, if you feeling like DYING — you will get up when that baby tells you.

2. There is no private time. Being alone in a house with a child means that you are their companion. But children tend to be the “stalkers” of relationships. Have to go to the bathroom? Get ready for an audience. Want to take a shower? They’ve got some awkward for you in the form of two curious eyes.

3. Lists, appointments, schedules now mean nothing. Older children? You have a better chance. With infants, you’ll be lucky if you can put food in your mouth to ensure your own survival. You'll also learn to do everything using only one hand. A MacGyver of sorts.

4. You are in charge of developing a HUMAN BEING. They will learn from you, depend on your nourishment, and rely on you for “maintenance”. Your conversations will revolve around one-word sentences, sounds, and over-exaggerated facial expressions. (Try going from this to an adult conversation — it’s interesting.) You will find something from every orifice on their body on you. They will throw food at you. They will not eat what you want them to, and refuse to compromise (they’re infants, they don’t know what this means, so don’t try).

Despite all of this (sleep deprivation, lack of privacy, demise of adult duties, weight of society on your shoulders) stay-at-home parents function. They go to sleep, wake up, and willingly do this all again. There is no recognition in the outside world. They don’t bring home big paychecks, get designated lunch breaks, or a social interaction beyond peek-a-boo.

After my recent day-of-fun, I came upon 5 p.m. without showering, food in what used to be my hair, pajamas still on (but covered in drool, food, and I can’t even tell you for sure what else), a resounding feeling of exhaustion, an empty stomach that sounded like a car trying to start, and a teething baby permanently attached to my hip. But I did clean. The house was clean. I grasped that accomplishment, along with the fact that my child was safe, cared for, and maybe even a little smarter, and went to bed with a renewed appreciation for all those who stay at home with their children.

So, next time you think of occupations, don’t leave this one out. It is, without a doubt, one of the most challenging, demanding, and wonderful jobs there is. And then bring a stay-at-home parent a present. Trust me, they deserve it.