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Generational divide when it comes to dating

Dear Annie: I’m lucky in that I feel as if I can talk to my parents about everything — everything, that is, except my dating life. My parents met in high school and got married while still attending their local state college. I’m in my mid-20s, and though I’d like a family one day, I’m currently working on getting my master’s degree and working part time. This leaves little room for dating. My parents get their hopes up every time I tell them I’ve met a guy, and it crushes me to disappoint them when it doesn’t go anywhere. It’s tiring trying to explain to my mom that going on a few dates with a guy doesn’t mean that we’re on the road to marriage. Twenty-first-century dating is so complicated. I can’t imagine having a conversation with my mom about navigating Tinder or reading into Instagram likes or being ghosted. I’ve stopped telling them about my dating life because it seems easier that way, but it also feels as if I’m hiding part of my life from my parents. Annie, how do I bridge this generational gap? — Single Sally

Dear Single: Give your parents more credit, Sally. You think your generation is the first to experience guys disappearing after a few dates? Imagine only having a landline to communicate. Though you don’t have to share the nitty-gritty details with your folks, it sounds as if they want to be there for you to share in the good times and the bad. This “gap” is of your own making. Though potentially awkward, explaining dating apps to your mom could be enlightening and even fun.

Your parents should appreciate your dedication to finding the right man, as opposed to just settling down. Better to be the tortoise who takes her time getting married than the hare who’s speeding toward her second divorce.

Dear Readers: Recently, I printed a letter from “Snoring in Slumberland,” who was waking himself up with his own snoring. I received responses from readers on both sides of the bed.

Dear Annie: My hubby snores. I can go to a spare bedroom at the other end of the house and still hear him.

I have done a lot of searching online for a solution to my problem. Here is what I found: If the snorer can keep his mouth shut, he will not snore. Snoring happens through the mouth. This is probably why you can buy those little bands that fit around the chin and head. In any case, Hubby won’t try to curb his snoring or move to another room, so it has been up to me to find a solution. Mine has been an iPod, noise-canceling earbuds and soothing music. It helps some, sort of like white noise.

For myself, I have decided I never want to put someone through this, so I have learned to sleep with my chin tucked firmly against my shoulder to keep my mouth shut. — Married to a Snorer

Dear Annie: Tell “Snoring in Slumberland” to go see a pulmonary disease doctor.

My wife discovered that when I was sleeping, I was not breathing at times. After seeing the pulmonary doctor, I began using a machine that pumps air into my nose. Some weeks later, I got a “chin strap,” which keeps my mouth shut while I sleep. (I had also noted a dry mouth.) I was waking while snoring, apparently. The addition of a chin strap solved the problem. To Mr. Slumberland: Good luck with your sleeping! — Catching Zzz’s Once Again

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Dear Annie is written by Annie Lane, a young, married mother of two. Send questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

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